Once upon a time, being a man meant being an alpha male. You played sports and had the muscles to prove it. You were the breadwinner, saving damsels in distress and providing for them to run a home and raise children. You were not weak, showing emotions and feeling all the feelings. You were strong and mature, dependable no matter how tough the going got. Once upon a time being a man meant denying yourself any softness or femininity, not having the luxury to cry no matter how sad you felt.

Fortunately, times have changed. Just as it’s become normal for women to focus on ambition and career as much as marriage and children, so too the norms of rigid masculinity have relaxed for men.

I recently hosted a conversation on Clubhouse about what makes a man a man. We explored what determines manhood with the following questions:

1. 1. Is the biology you are born with?
   2. Is it the physical characteristics you develop as you go through puberty? The presence of facial hair, a deeper baritone of voice.
   3. Does a boy become a man when he gets sexually intimate?
   4. Do men most feel like men when they are only in the presence of women? Does being an alpha in a woman’s life make them feel more masculine?

Of course, the biology you’re born with, the physical characteristics you develop, the gender you are brought up with and your relation with the women in your life go a long way in developing your sense of manhood. But being a man is about so much more than external physical descriptors or saving damsels in distress (spoiler alert: women aren’t looking for saviours. We are looking for partners).

Here’s the room’s collective opinion on what truly What makes a man feel like a man is – when one is a better human, the person can adapt to the qualities like being respectful to people around him. Being compassionate and exhibiting his vulnerability. When he owns the power of self-belief. The person is accountable and holds himself responsible for his failures or success in life.

The line of gender difference is now blurring, it also empowered the women individuals today. It’s time to move ahead and make the journey towards a better place for all kinds of gender to disappear and live together as human individuals. Leaving you with the question ‘Who you are beyond your physical construct?’ Let me know by commenting below.

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